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dream

MY eyes are closed and my mind is open but something is different.
My thoughts are not my own, the goals set are not mine, the accomplishments made were not for me
It seems I have lived my whole life for others not paying attention to what I want to do, or say
How I want to dress or act, Being controlled by all not just my parents, btu everyone.
It is hard for me to  feel disapointment from other people so I try to avoid the conflict by making them happy
I say quiet saying nothing as I always do
But when is enough?
I have beent told " why don't you dress like a girl?" because my style does not include skirts and dresses, high heels, and tight shirts.
I have been told "grow up" because I wanted to take my 7 and 9 year old cousins trick or treating
I have been belittled in everyway possible because my life did not meet the needs of others.
When is it ok to take my life back and live it as I want?
When is " my dreams of being an author  and a singer" acceptible?
I know being a singer is almost impossible but it doesn't hurt to dream, does it?
Have any of you ever had your dreams crush? do you know what that feels like?
The twisting of your stomach and dropping of your heart, I do not wish that on anyone
I say eneough is enough I am proud of who I am and who I want to become, no longer will I stay
silent as my body is used as a puppet, I want to be seen as me nto as what I am wanted to be.

YOu have to dream, anything less is unacceptible without dreams people have nothing to work towards.. Please if you are reading this send my your dreams And I will make sure they are heard and respected.

With this

Darkness  fades as peace comes to light
What once wasmis now again
What had most cower before it does not frighten me
With this gift that is my voice I will no longer be sad
With this love that is my heart I will nolonger be afraid
I will stand tall and love hard,
Forgiving many but forgetting nothing
With this tool that is my hand I will write my mind, place my fears into the open,
hope that all will see and applaud as we over come together.
So I hand the mike to you only asking that you use it, say what needs to be said and not what wants to be heard

What I am

A Lily Rose, Cat tail, Bolder, and Butterfly lay in a flat line across  the cool grass with morning dew still fresh. "I am a Daisy in a field of weeds, a strawberry in a bowl of dried prunes" she tells her self. "I have seen the future and am afraid of what is to come, but I know I can do something great" She picks up the Lily Rose and held it up to the sun. "I am a Lily Rose, sweet, and two great flowers in one, I am delicate and loved by many, but i am also one of a kind" She laid the flower back down  and picked up another one, a Cat tail. "I am a Cat tail my skin is touched by the sun, a brown so confident in it self and always standing tall. Like a Cat tail i stand above my surroundings" she put down the Cat tail  and walked over to the bolder, putting both hands on the side of it she said "I am a rock, strong and firm, I will not be moved. When put in pressure I will become something great, a diamond"  she sits by a leaf with a muticolored butterfly  resting on it. " I am a butterfly, I am beautiful and elegant, and I will fly one day" The girl stood up and walked upon the field  to a watering hole. There were grazing sheep, feedind cows and butting bulls. " I am a bull; I will not stop fighting for what I want , I will push and drive until there is no more competition. I will never give up or stop charging when I am close to my destiny"

Pics from paris

CHECKING IN

Im in London right now for the first time. just left Paris. I miss everyone and I'M HAVING A GRET TIME, IM FINE AND WILL BE LEAVING TO GO HOME TOMORROW. LOVE YOU ALLL

What hero would you be?

Have you ever wanted to be a hero when you were little? A super hero with super powers and secret identities. I did, I wanted to be like

the lone ranger but with powers. I had a black hat and called myself the shadow ranger.

Or did you pretend you were

the villian that would stop at nothing to defeat his enemy.

think about it

You can THINK you are doing the right thing for you but, remember you aren't the only on affected by YOUR decisions.

my babies birthday video

I created this video to celebrate my brothers second birthday.

:-)

Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2/23

Today you are two let the world see how wonderful you are as I do

Happppppppy birthday baby boy you make your sister proud :-)

My thoughts

Everyone can see but no one truly looks.
Everyone has a brain but not everyone truly thinks.
Everyone has a heart but not many people use it.
Many things change but the way people think remains the same.

INfallible

A smile so perfect that melts the hearts of those who see it,
Although no one is perfect he is the closest human I have seen to it,
Fore he is Infallible.

His presence gives me hope,
He makes me want so much more for myself ,
More than what I am, I want to be like him,
He has done so much by doing nothing at all
Fore is infallible.

It is easy to think so much of someone who has only entered this earth for 1 and a half years,
But no one hods the love that I hold for this child who will grow into a man,
And not the wanna be men who say they are men but have no clue what that means to be one,
But a real man.
HE will be proud and strong and understand people make mistakes. He will not judge.
Fore he is infallible.

He is more than just my brother or a family member he is a symbol that we still have a chance to do something great, thet the world is still waiting for some one to take charge, and who knows he may be the one to do it
For my baby boy is infallible

Left behind

The walls hold a truth hidden from the rest of us, an unspoken silence that haunts this place.

Windows hold dreams of leaving this place

The floors carry the weight of the world but carry no praise for letting us stand

the long forsaken creaks become silenced as well.

The forgotten memories of her only girl slowly disappeared along with the hopes and dreams of her son. Stains left from days where her husband drank like a fish and struck her under confused anger. Doors lock in the steady screams that no one hears, and scratches scarred the floor from being dragged and locked away like unwanted clothes.

Possesions left behind in the fight for life.

The front door....
The only hope this had.
But they never made it to the otherside

TOny,me and TT

MY second dad I love so much, my tiny sister too.

I say we kinda look alike but tell me is it true? I have a lot of family and love them all to death, so heres my dad and baby girl.

His Story

His eyes shine through the dark yet he can not be seen,
His voice carries for miles yet he is never heard,
As big as his heart is he only loves half as much,
Is mind is filled with the pressure of it all,
But he does not break.

Instead he moves on to a new spot and screams louder and looks harder,
But he is still not heard or seen as people walk by him unware he is there,
One girl stops at the moving of his lips and although she can't hear him at first, his eyes tell a story,
A story she knows to well.


She tells him to follow her to a mountain top and he does,
The dusty rode they take is slicked with ice and loose rocks,
At one point he slips only holding on by a hand on a rock,
The girl leans over and says "Do you trust me?"



He hesisates fore he only had to depend on himself,
"Do you trust me?" she reapeats
"Yes" he finally says now losing his grip on the rock,
"The you have to let go".

Once agian he hesistates over thinking the impact of the fall,
"Trust me... and let go" Now her eyes shined as bright as his and he could read her story,
Her eyes let him know it was ok to let go,
And her smile told him he wouldn't be hurt.


He let go but he did not fall instead he flew,
Fore she had wings and now so did he,
He was heard by everyone that day as he told the story of the angel that saved him,
And she told the angels of the man who saved her.